The Shortlist

Yesterday JJ came to program for the first time in a long time. I was catching up with him outside and asked how things were going.

He said he'd be getting in fights at school.

He said when he gets called on in class he usually gets the answer wrong and some other kids have started making fun of him for being stupid. So when that happens he challenges them to a fight. I told him I can't stop other kids from saying mean things to him and neither can he, and asked him what is something he could control in that situation.

We talked about finding the balance between caring what everyone thinks and not caring what anyone thinks - neither being a good option.

We decided to make a list of the people who he should care about what they think with the qualification being that he knows they love him. The list included God, his mom, his brother, his mentor, and the coaches at Forerunner.

For our boys, you might be on the shortlist of people that they trust to love them. What an immense honor and opportunity. And for some of our kids, you might not be on their list yet - but just by showing up and being consistent in loving well no matter how much they try your patience, it's only a matter of time before the anger, fear, and shame that keeps a kid from receiving the love they need will be conquered in the name of Jesus.