Here’s a picture from a day after program last month. It’s after hours at Forerunner and the neighborhood kids came out to play. Two of our K-6th program coaches stayed out here pitching Forerunner to them. Including others into a story bigger than themselves, but a story they’re worthy to have a chapter in.

It’s simple moments like this that lead me to dream bigger about our role in the community. To build relationships. To set the table for mentoring moments. To develop places of belonging everywhere we go.

-Stephen Murray, Executive Director

One day, one of our boys did not want to be at program. We’ll call him “Z” for short. Z wasn’t having a good day, and he was separating himself from the group. One of our coaches went to go speak with him, but as he did, two other boys came up to them. “Remember last week when you didn’t want to be at Forerunner?” our coach said to one of the boys. “Well today, Z doesn’t want to be at program. What would you say to him right now?” The boy immediately gets up and gives him the kindest hug ever seen. He then gives Z some of his crackers. The other boy chimes in and says, “we love you Z, you’re a man of God.”

This is what it looks like inside the four walls of our after-school program. A room filled with boys who carry so much potential, yet who are also trying to push through hard days. Maybe hard days at school or a hard week at home, just in need of someone to call out who they are. That they’re “a man of God.”

This is what Forerunner looks like, and how to live as a forerunner. A program where boys become brothers, encouraging and sharpening one another in truth. A community endeavor where boys look out for one another and where men show up to encourage those in whose shoes they found themselves just yesterday. Seek relationships where people call out who you truly are. It’s in those kinds of relationships where we’re reminded of who we are, and empower us to fulfill our potential. Relationships change lives.

Raising up future leaders in everything you do.

You really never know what you are going to hear on any given day when you work with kids. Sometimes they can be really sweet, sometimes they can be super silly, and honestly sometimes they can be pretty mean. Kids can SAY a lot, but I am always really interested in what they DO.

One of my favorite things that our kids do is dream about who they are becoming. I’m sure that all of the NBA and NFL players have probably gotten used to kids wanting to be like them when they grow up, but it hits different when a kid is like “I want to be like YOU when I am older”.

One of our forerunners (we’ll called him “R” for short) has been a part of Forerunner for a while now and talks all the time about how he wants to be a coach when he grows up. That, by itself, speaks volumes. But SAYING something is much different than DOING something. I believe that one day R will be a coach at Forerunner, and this past month he showed me he already is.

A younger student was in trouble for slapping another student on the back of the head. That student chased him and slapped him back. It happened again.

If we are all being honest, things like that can get under our skin. We find ourselves at times wondering “are we really doing this again?“. But instead of rolling our eyes or taking a deep sigh, at Forerunner remember that we are in it for the long game and that THIS single moment is life changing. That’s what we do. We are the adults. We are the mentors. We are the coaches.

Yesterday, R was the adult. He was the mentor. He was the coach. As I was speaking with the other student, I heard the words of a future leader:

“Yah…sometimes I want to do stuff like that too but we have to remember that it’s not okay to hurt other people. Yah…that makes sense. That’s just not who we are. Hey, is it okay if I show you this magic trick that I’ve been learning?”

The students face lit up.

R is an example of all the coaches that have come before him. He has a little bit of Coach Braxton. A little bit of Coach Joel. A little bit of Coach Bailey. Coach Caitlyn. Coach Taj. And now he is already getting to pass that on to the next coach.

Make no mistake, you may feel at times like you are not being heard, but you are being watched. And what is watched will always be done too. If you’re a coach, mentor, teacher, parent or other — You are raising up future leaders in everything you do.

What will it look like one day to be like you?

-Quinn Holman, K-6th Program Coordinator

I was just saying hi to the K-6 team for a bit on my way out the door one night last month, and I overheard something one of our coaches told to one of our boys. (We’ll call the boy “S” for short)

S was playing Ryan, one of our coaches, in Connect Four, and Trae (another coach) was watching from the side. Ryan would put a token in the slot, and S would quickly put his token in to block whatever strategy he thought Ryan was trying. Trae saw that - and coached S from the side saying something to the affect of “Focus on your own game S. Don’t make your next move a retaliation of his. Focus on what you want to do.”

It didn’t hit me until I was driving home, but that was mentoring in action. S was just playing a game, and he could have kept playing the way he was playing without anyone stepping in to help him learn a better way, but he had a mentor pull up a chair, pay attention, and start coaching.

Those are the moments that a kid is going to remember - and they won’t just remember it when they’re playing a game. Those messages are the things that will sink in, even if it doesn’t seem like it was heard in the moment, and it will change their whole perspective. I can see it playing out like this:

S is going to encounter the unkindness of another kid, and that might happen a hundred times before he handles it differently than he does right now. But one day, it’s going to happen and something will shift. He’ll be thinking through how he’s going to respond to what another kid is saying about him…and he’s going to think something like this: “Coach Trae would tell me to focus on the right things. He would tell me not to live my life in retaliation of what they said. So I’m going to let it go. I’m not going to let what they think of me change what I think of myself. Just because they’re being mean, doesn’t mean I have to be mean back. I’m not going to get revenge or be someone I don’t want to be. I’m going to stay focused on who I want to be and what’s already true about who I am.”

That’s the power you have and the opportunity to seize everyday. Relationships change lives. Your words are heard, and they matter. These kids are listening and paying attention to your words. I guarantee it.

-Beth Winter, Director of Operations

Success and failure are fraternal twins.

Last month, NBA / Team USA Coach Ty Ellis came to share with the young men in our Junior High program for “Guest Speaker Wednesday”. He trained Steph Curry, Devin Booker, and some current top prospects. He talked about his current coaching career and the importance of having mental fortitude.

He stuttered as a kid. He asked his grandmother, “Why me? ”

His grandmother told him about Moses and said that he was special. She said that he would travel the world one day to speak and help others. He currently does all of that and much more. He was very inspiring. I believe that yesterday exited out more boxes of excuses for our young men to not be successful. They are special, they are valuable, and they will impact the world one day in their own unique way.

"Uncomfortable things, we have to feel them, before we can move through the process of healing them and get to the other side. And often that is a much shorter window if we just allow ourselves to feel that it's uncomfortable, it's awkward, it's difficult, and sometimes it's painful. We go through painful things in life. But if we can deal with those, if we can process them with a mentor or a parent or someone who is close to us, we can often be able to move through those much quicker and have sustainable life” -Jordan Rogers, Founder at Perseus Creative

It was so good to have Jordan Rogers (@jordanrogers26) a father, business leader, and mentor within our Lake Highlands community share with the young men in our Junior High Program last month. Jordan helps college athletes be brave, think differently, and celebrate victory as they navigate the NIL sphere. More than that, he believes in empowering the next generation and serving others. He helped our young men know they can channel their creativity through different avenues and they are each capable of fulfilling their potential by leaning into mentors and people around you that you trust.

Womanhood and motherhood. We don’t talk about it enough. But the women and mothers in our families ministry have so much potential.

They’re more than just beneficiaries of a Ladies’ Night. They’re women who carry dreams and desires for their families, vision for their children’s children, and legacies they long to leave behind.

Last month, women and the mothers of the boys we serve in our programs gathered for a Thanksgiving potluck dinner and shared their response to this question: What are you thankful for?

Many of them said their family. Their children. This program. The season God has them in. Another mother to lean on. People who believe in them. Their sons coming home after a day discovering their identity that they’re a man of God who can fulfill his potential.

We’re so thankful for these women who empower their sons to fulfill their potential. Who are leaving a legacy for their children. Who show up day in and day out when no one is watching, championing their sons into the men they’re becoming today.

A willing heart. And time. The only things needed to be the best mentor a boy needs. Someone who has a willing heart to show up and give their time away to build a relationship that will produce confidence and belonging. Pray for these two mentor matches that happened in November. May these young men grow in their confidence as men of God by walking alongside their mentors who will embody godly character.

A compounding investment that will bear dividends.

According to our data from the last year of programming, we provided over 21,280 hours of investment into the lives of boys and their families. The average youth mentoring program will invest around 20 hours in the life of a child annually. I recently saw a program that serves almost 3,000 students with 50,000 collective hours of investment annually. That’s roughly 16 hours annually. On average, here’s what our breakdown is:

Average K-6 Forerunner = 296 hours of mentoring
Average 7-8 Forerunner = 162 hours of mentoring
Average 9-12th Forerunner = 61 hours of mentoring

Getting this kind of time invested with a child is truly invaluable. A compounding investment that will bear dividends for the rest of their lives. It is truly a privilege to get to spend this much time with our Forerunners. Thank you for supporting us and believing in our mission to see every boy growing up without a father-figure at home in Lake Highlands fulfill their potential through mentoring, programs, and family support in the name of Jesus. These hours of investment could not be possible without your support.

Relationships Change Lives.

November 2022 "Month-in-Review"